A little of this…

Contrary to the rumours, I didn’t cause the Jennifer Aniston/Brad Pitt breakup. Just wanted to get that out of the way…

Man, I have been in a creative slump lately. That’s why our weekly session was put off by a few days – I just couldn’t seem to get started. So instead of trying too hard this week, here’s some random hits and bits:

–Every now and again, I peruse the comments section at the end of each weekly essay, noticing the same two people commenting on how much they don’t like what they read. My question…why are you still reading? Wait – don’t answer that.

–We’re almost two weeks in 2005 and the New Year’s Resolutions are popping up all over the place, especially at the gym I go to. Cheap monthly rates and the desire to ‘finally do it’ have taken over the space I go to release the day’s frustrations. The business of gyms is a funny one, as the owners are basically hoping people don’t go so they can sign up even more people to take their place at the machines. It’s a brilliant plan – exactly how many members can a gym even have? By the looks of it, the Bridge Street Planet Fitness has 28,348 members all coming at once. I wish there was a monthly contest for exactly how many new people will disappear within the month.

–I really hate snowfall, especially when I have to drive somewhere. I freely admit it: I’m the guy who drives foolishly slow and is very cautious when the white stuff flies. I’m not sure why, but I think it traces back to when I first got my license and almost drove off a hillside in a freezing rainstorm. Had it not been for the the large snowbanks, I was most likely done for. Since then, I’ve been a bit more careful but hey, someone’s got to be That Guy. Being careful in bad driving weather hit home last week when two friends at work knew people that died due to car accidents that day. Not scraped up, people – actual death. It got me to thinking about how you never know how the day’s going to end when you wake up in the morning. I’m not going to preach, but it was just something I was thinking about. (But if you’re the person driving around in the huge truck with no regard for others…well, just stop.)

–Was there anything less shocking than Brad Pitt and Jenn Aniston’s marriage breakup? Seriously, is there anything even remotely surprising in Hollyweird anymore? I had a good conversation the other day about the subject of celebrity and at what point, notoreity changes someone. I imagine that everyone that becomes famous says they aren’t going to lose their friends and they aren’t going to change. Somehow, though, everything changes doesn’t it? Celebrity is of varying degrees though, especially with athletes at high school and minor league levels, but the results end up being the same: adopting a class system-type attitude and enjoying the fruits while barely enduring the labor. With entertainers, I believe the attitude changes with time and success.

With athletes, life changes while they are quite young and coddled for what they can do on the playing fields. The mindset is instilled at such a young age that they have no choice but to take advantage of all that is given to them. They don’t know any better, but is that an excuse? Celebrities, though, are just normal people – just highly-paid for their profession and kept at arm’s length by those who want to create the illusion of importance. Should we even care that Brad and Jenn are separated or is it more important to worry about your own family issues? Will their lack of love directly affect our lives? Of course not, but we certainly seem to treat it like it does.

That reminds me…did you hear about Jude Law and Angeline Jolie? They were….oh, forget it.

–Finally, two readers sent in submissions for the Readers Response column. Since that never happened, here are their unedited pieces…enjoy:

-If you live or work in a city (like Portland, Maine or Manchester, NH, or any other medium to large city), there’s a good chance you feel the way I do about this. I absolutely hate pedestrians. Hate em. All of them. A pedestrian cost me my first driver’s exam by stepping near a crosswalk as I drove by (the inspector believed I should have slammed on the brakes and come to a screeching halt just in case this person chose to cross). I hate the attitude pedestrians have. They’ll step off the curb and into the street and just expect traffic to stop for them because the law says so, no matter what the consequences. These people will willingly put themselves in front of moving vehicles that greatly outweigh them, often without even looking to see if there is traffic, and they do it because they feel they have the right to. I think they shouldn’t have that right. I think that giving pedestrians the right of way was an awful idea. How many times have you been sitting at a red light and you see someone looking to cross the road, and they begin walking across, right in front of you, right as your light turns green (and they always take their sweet ass time). Or how about when they cross when they have the “don’t walk” sign flashing and you have a green light, and the person in front of you has to stop to let them go, and you wind up missing the light because of it. May not seem like that big a deal, but when you are in a rush (like going from one job right to another) it becomes a big deal. The streets were made for cars, not people, therefore cars should have the right of way. If there is someone in a crosswalk and it won’t cause problems to let them cross, of course I do it. But then there are cases where I’m being tailgated (assholes) and if I stop, I might get rear-ended, all so some pedestrian can get across the street 10 seconds quicker than if they just waited for traffic to clear. This problem is greatest in cities because they have the most pedestrians, so this happens all the time (every try to drive in the Old Port in Portland during a weekend?). I think pedestrians should have to wait for traffic to clear to cross a road, or wait at a crosswalk and go when the signal says to go. If I offended any of you pedestrians who are reading this, tough. Cross when and where you’re supposed to cross, and leave us drivers alone. Man, that was theraputic….



and

so for one reason or another i just looked up the imdb listing for high fidelity, you know, that movie with john cusack – easily my favorite guy to carry out of the 80s – andrew mccarthy was my favorite guy in the 80s -mostly because of less than zero but a little because of pretty in pink- and jack black and whole bunch of other people whose names i’d go “oh,that guy” to and you’d go “who?” to, including that chick that looks startling like robin wright (penn) – it always pains me so much to associate anything with that pompous ass – i mean what kind of a genius can he be, he married madonna – although, i woulda married madonna back then too so what can i say? – so much so that i always think it’s still her until i read her name in print – it’s Iben Hjejle (you just try to tell me how to pronounce that one) in case you’re wondering – it’s almost disconcerting and i used toreally like tim robbins in that movie but now that is my least favorite part – anyway, i digress…



the movie is based on a book by a guy named nick hornby too – i’ve lost my train of thought because i was just interrupted by a phone call from a friend – i went looking at this description and stumbled upon that lovely woman’s name because i had read a blog entry last week that made me laugh ( http://queserasera.org/archives/000867.html ) and then it occurred to me that john cusack’s name in the movie was rob and that there was a liz but then i remembered that liz in the movie was in fact rob and laura’s (that’s the iben hjejle girl) friend played by joan cusack who has certainly been in enough movies with and probably not always like that but also because of her brother not that there’s anything wrong with that -the other part about the blog entry is that as big a fan of missy as i am (and i am, make no mistake) i love the original version of that song just as much and now i can’t remember who sings it so i’ll have to look it up – Ann Peebles – you think she’s any relation to melvin and mario van peebles? or maybe to pebbles? anyway, i think my train of thought has run off the tracks and i am going to go now…



On that strange note,

thanks for reading,

nason

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One thought on “A little of this…

  1. Hey Josh, I love your writing man, why you calling me out?? I think it’s pretty normal that most comment spaces whether it be at a restaurant or in a forum be used mostly by those ‘criticizing or suggesting.’ An analogy: a lesser-known band Mcluskey recently broke up and only then did they get countless emails from fans they never knew they had pleading for them to get back together. So I’m sure people like what they’re reading, you just dont know it.

    -lil Nase

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